I hate my female-killer India

Baby Afreen, 3 months old, when still alive, in coma, struggling to battle for life post being battered by her own father; her fault -- being a female. May you rest in peace.

Yes, I hate my India which kills its females en masse. And India has been doing it shamelessly and remorselessly for many millennia. To highlight the height of mockery, India is one of those rare societies that prides itself on its tradition of worshiping female Goddesses, putting them on the highest pedestal in the hierarchy of power in the pantheon.

The point of proof is India’s pathetically unmatched records in its gender ratio. Amongst Indians, approx. 150 females are missing for every 1000 males. I firmly believe that in an increasingly globalizing world with shrinking boundaries, the world needs to know how exactly does India manage to achieve this shocking distinction in female foeticide. Well, by simply killing its unwanted females – wherever it can lay its hands on - in womb or in any of the various phases of a female’s life cycle.

I am sure a sneek peek of the Indian traditional methods adopted to get rid of an unwanted female fetus or a kid is as diverse as the country itself! And the unity displayed in the mission is also incredible!

India has an array of tricks up its sleeves which would be beyond the wildest of the imagination of the rest of the world! And it is not the privilege of the poor; rich are equal champions in this game of eliminating females. The difference however lies in the manner and the method. A poor prefers to kill the unwanted female member once she is born. A rich on the contrary doesn’t have the time so the killing is planned in the pre-natal stage itself; in aid come the omnipresent ultrasound shops which boldly flout the legal restrictions on gender identification of a fetus. The former of course cannot afford this luxury thus sticks to the traditional methods. And whoever said that India is a developing country needs to rethink; India is for sure much advanced in technologies to determine the sex of a growing fetus! Also, whosoever said that Indians are sympathetic and kind, please reorganize your thoughts as the boys-obsessed citizens of this great country do not even blink before literally beating the hell out of a mother’s womb! Yes, it is true. Here, the “hell” is the female fetus.

The techniques followed in the post natal stage are equally diverse. Some would put large dosage of chewing tobacco in the mouth of the newborn baby, intoxicate her with nicotine and kill her. This is of course “mercy killing”. The other ways are so barbaric and brutal that the dreaded Auswitz camps in the Hilter era would seem like heaven! Many resort to drowning the girl child in milk immediately after her birth; some put her in a pot and bury her alive; and if you still have the guts to listen further, then, many male child obsessed Indians brutally torture her by biting, beating, burning, breaking her bones and bringing her to such a physical vegetative condition that a normal person with an average sized heart would pray immediate death for her – in case, of course, the little one has endured and survived the hell in hands of her own parents – that is the father and his family in almost all cases. And we Indians pretend to be messiah of kindness!

In India if a girl child has survived because of whatever factor, she is given a life which is worse that hell. There is blatant discrimination in all aspects of life – be it food, education, healthcare, clothing, freedom to live per se. A “google” would throw up shameful facts about how Indians treat their female population. And a walk in any lane in an Indian neighborhood would give a clear picture of the life of a female.

Though India is an independent country, a democratic one on top of it, but there is absolutely no freedom for a female. Her entire life is in hands of her own people and the people around her – at home and in streets. My definition of a free life for a female is when she is able to determine her own mobility, sexuality and fertility. And India cannot provide any of these. Every aspect of a female’s life is decided by somebody else – if she survives of course. She is subjected to numerous role plays at various stages of her life. She is either a daughter or a sister or a wife or a mother or a grandmother; never ever she gets treated like a human.

A sacred union like marriage is bizarrely called an institution in India. It is not considered a union or a relationship. A female is required by a male because by default she carries a womb inside her. For sexual gratification he can always have the pleasure of the company of a prostitute or he will have his prey. Rape is taken as a birthright by Indian males – and this includes marriage. And that is the reason why absolutely no value is attached to the aspect of “liking” or “choice” as in a male’s mind the private parts are the “same” in every female which is good for copulating and producing legal offspring – male child at the first go and then a female child to have a “complete” family! Wow! We Indians are so evolved that we exactly know how to control the conjugation of an ovum and a sperm! God couldn’t have been so perfect in making them mate! In India, this unique phenomenon is called “Family Planning”!

In case you are still pondering over this uniquely Indian phrase, let me tell you exactly how it is executed in an Indian family, practice being directly in proportion to the wealth one has! As soon as somebody’s wife gets pregnant, he and his family – yes, nothing moves in India, especially when it comes to ‘family’ matters without the consent of one’s family! – get the sex determination done of the developing fetus and the decision to “keep it” depends on the gender of the fetus. 100% of the male fetuses are allowed to grow further and most of the female fetuses are aborted. A woman has to undergo this trauma – both physical and emotional – many a times if “she” is unable to conceive a male child. Repeated forced abortions are a norm. Then there are families where “no girl child” policy is practiced with perfect ease.

Now you know why India has a grossly skewed male:female ratio of 1000:850. The case is worse in affluent parts of the country and its cities. And now, perhaps, you would understand why most of the Indian families in cities especially are “complete” with one elder male child and a younger female child – well in almost all cases.

What I find even more shocking is the fact that in spite of females being in “short supply” still she can get married only after having “purchased” a groom, often at exorbitant price! “Dowry” as a term may not be in use or relevant in many societies of the world, I am sure of it.

The story doesn’t end here; if she is unable to bring in “enough” dowry, she is tortured both physically and mentally and in many cases burnt alive by her husband and his family. Yes, this is how marriages are made in India! Still somehow the Indian society has remained in the traps of “arranged marriage” with caste and religion considerations as intact, which I think is the root cause of most of the malaise afflicting the Indian society since centuries till today.

Then there are other horrendous treatment meted out to females in India.

And India is a country which had the second female prime minister in the modern history of the world. Even today, the most powerful politicians are mostly females.

And, as a nation – I repeat – we pride ourselves on being worshippers of female Goddesses.

I say, it is time for us to evolve as a society. Till the change sets in, let us throw away all the Goddesses idols in the trash bin. At least we will rid ourselves of the sin of “hypocrisy”.

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First it was Falak, and now it is Afreen, … these are only two of the millions of babies killed brutally every year in India. We know and are talking about them thanks to the vibrant Indian Media. It is time we corrected our mindset. India is a great country; but its citizens will also have to exhibit the same greatness. We have to evolve from being animals and become humans – evolve from being medieval in our mindset and become citizens of a modern world.

May you rest in peace, Falak and Afreen and scores of murdered baby girls of India. Your butchers will not be spared. They will be hanged till death. … Till the “changes” set in India, in the society and its judiciary and polity, I openly say that I hate my female-killer Indians.

Nargis, Welcome to this Big, Bad World! ...

Hello, Nargis! Congratulations for being heralded as the 7th Billion Baby on this Earth!

And, sorry for spoiling your 1^st day on this planet by presenting the facts of our world as being ‘Big & Bad”.

I know you are too small to understand the irony of this “distinct status” but I still thought of not being untruthful to you on your first day in life. Actually, I could not summon enough courage to tell you anything other than the truths. But whatever I am going to reveal to you are relevant from the Indian perspective only. If you were born in a more developed part of the world, your could grow to be a true Destiny Child! Not in India, unfortunately.

Nargis baby, let me introduce us Indians to you. We Indians are amongst the most hypocritical of the lot and, therefore, we behave in a manner which could be best described as “unique”. We love to believe that we worship female form of God’s creation by pretending to be worshiping Goddesses – and we have plenty of them, all described and presented as the most powerful & feared ones! But in total contrast we indulge into meting out some of the most despicable treatments possible to a human being i.e. to our women folk – spanning the entire stages of life.

On birth of a girl child we mourn. This is when the female foetus could survive. Else, we finish the root cause of our misery in its inception stage itself and we feel no remorse in practicing female foeticide. And that is the reason India’s sex ratio is pathetically skewed towards males (1000:835 approx.). But this is what we are made to believe based on the internationally established benchmark; for us, a male child is a divine blessing! And, vice-versa for a female baby – needless to repeat.

Then, if a girl child survives in spite of the harshest of the conditions being ensured around her birth, she is ignored completely and allowed to grow on her own. The mother’s contribution is not much besides feeding her with her own milk in the initial few months and then leaving her to survive on a mal-nourished diet comprising of “leftovers” – a diet which is going to stay with her as a “habit” for her lifetime, till whatever time she manages to be alive.

Barely she learns to walk that she is made to do household chores like sweeping, cleaning utensils, washing clothes, graduating to cooking while still a child and contributing to rearing of her male siblings, if the mother is blessed thereafter! (The scene in an educated household is a bit better in terms of facilities and treatment but at the core the disdain is almost the same. Mind you, the female foeticide cases are more in urban areas in comparison to the uneducated rural settings.)

Education for a female child, if undertaken, is taken with great difficulty and is still viewed as a necessary formality. Many of the females still get left out from the ambit of formal education. Even in today’s modern 21^st era, interestingly, education is considered to be an “investment” towards getting a better groom at a lower cost!

Yes, a female – irrespective of her family’s social and financial background – is “sold out” at a pre-fixed price to the prospective groom which is otherwise termed in the Indian society as “dowry”. If the dowry amount is not satisfactory, the bride is burnt without mercy!

And in between her life from being a baby to being a bride and beyond, she is expected to play only “roles” – of a daughter, a sister, a wife, a mother, a mother-in-law, a grand mother. Never she gets to live her own life as “She”. She is always somebody’s something!

This is the simple part of growing up as a female in India as far as that “somebody” is your “own” family. The complexities arise when the “others” start to exercise their “rights” on you just because of your gender. You will understand it fully when you grow up and try to walk the streets outside the walls of your home. Nargis, you would be utterly disgusted to see the other half of the population – males – behave in the most gutterly (gutter-like) fashion! They will ogle at you, pass vulgar remarks at you, try to touch you in public, harass you, physically abuse you and if the “opportunity” presents – or not – many would not even blink before deciding to molest you. And when you protest, you could get killed. And, if you survive, and decide to get the culprit punished, the honourable courts proceedings will make your life so miserable that you would either commit suicide or would end up as a mental wreck forever. You know, Nargis, in India, the onus is on the raped girl to prove her innocence!

Baby Nargis, you would have understood the value of a female life – and body – in our esteemed country which so hypocritically prides itself on being female Goddesses’ worshipers!

And that is the reason I wondered at the hype being created upon your birth as the 7^th billion baby on this earth! Firstly, because Indi as already over burdened with 1.2 billion people and secondly, but most unfortunately, you being a baby girl in India! (Again, mind you, an average Indian male’s life is also nothing to aspire for, but on this later …)

Therefore, Nargis, I wish you were born in a more developed parts of the world where your birth could be “welcome” in the most authentic manner and not as a mere “symbolism” – for what, I am yet to figure out! Where you could get an equal respect and opportunity towards everything in life – from life to life partner(s)! Where you were “you” and not somebody’s something merely.

Anyways, I wish you All The Best and Welcome you again in this Big and Bad World which is India! May God be with you always, baby Nargis … J

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The irony of the name Nargis is not lost on me: Nargis means a flower symbolizing life per se; Nargis was also the name given to the deadly cyclone which devastated Burma in 2008! Hope this baby Nargis always keeps growing like a flower J

India's Starved Sensibilities

That India is a country of people with starved sensibilities got established once again during Hina Rabbani Khar’s recent visit. Turning this crucial Pakistan foreign minister’s visit into a spectacle for frivolous fashion talks clearly tells a lot about the Indian mindset in dealing with females. Her youth, her intelligence, her capabilities, her intentions, all got blurred in the background and what remained in the never-flickering focus were her good looks, her Birkins, her Roberto Cavallis, her pearls, her dresses, her style sense, etc. etc. i.e. every thing that could define her feminity. For every Indian – effectively captured and presented to satisfy the Indian palate by the equally swayed Indian media – she was a female first and nothing beyond that. The sexist attitude of India towards her got more deplorable when many demented Indian minds resorted to describing her as Pakistan’s ploy, sent as a WMD – Woman of Mass Distraction! - to deflect from real political-foreign policies issues. As it is a well know fact about the infamous Indian mindset being the core of The Great Indian Hypocrisy, this malaise manifests in every aspect – facet – of life, in every corner of this great country of ours which prides itself on being worshipper of female Gods i.e. Goddesses.

You have to be a woman to understand it fully – “experience” is the operative term here. Ask any man – a male, I mean; India cannot boast of many “real” men – and he will flatly deny the existence of any such basal trait in “their half” of the population. If you too have any doubts about India’s sufferings, just take a walk around in any public place in any city/town of our so-called cultured country and the happenings will hit you full on.

It is a pretty common scene in any public place in India: lots of people, from all social backgrounds, with varied upbringings, with unequal levels of literacy – education still eludes many – and different economic status, lots of chaos, filth in equal proportion all around, extremely noisy and smelly. There would be more men than women, men again of all types but the “typical” ones dominating the space. By “typical ones” I mean those with “vacant look”, getting accentuated by yellowness of their eyes and brownness of their skin tone, their very ordinary faces bordering on ugliness with hairy skin making them seem absolutely avoidable, smelly body which you could almost “see”, wandering aimlessly till they spot a female – an average, decently dressed one, and not the “inviting” ones – the most self-suited explanation invented by human beings! You witness an instant transformation in their personality: from looking bored and depressed - from “empty eyes” to “hungry eyes” - they start smiling - that lecherous smile which makes you wish death for them. Then they start following her like a dog - their salivating pariah dog like appearance is so pathetic that if law was on your side you could shoot them pointblank. With their now all-active senses they start passing lewd remarks at her and loudly. If words fail them, they take help of film songs, the same songs which have been composed to celebrate something as crude as “eve-teasing” – India’s gift to the world culture! … And not even a single person – I told you in the beginning itself that India is severely deficient in real men – objects to this obscene harassment by men with leech-like attitude and avoids that situation with utter muteness and acquired blindness. The girl tries to run away from the place as fast as she could. And this is not an isolated incident; at the same place at any given point of time, almost all females present there would be facing the same humiliation.

Picture is almost same everywhere; from ordinary places to so called high places. The attitude is same in males representing the entire spectrum of India – well, exception are there but they are in “minority”; gentlemen are a “rarity” in India.

To tell you something interesting: a female wearing sunglasses is a “sight” for Indian males as for them it is a thing of “style” and not for “protection of eyes against harsh sunrays” and for some strange reason they feel extremely excited about it. And believe me, from a person on bitumen – roads – to a male in a BMW, they all behave the same!

But, ask any Indian male and he will deny it flatly. His argument will be – is always – that if India was so bad or unsafe, you wouldn’t be seeing females walking around unescorted. To all such males I have to say only one thing: go home and ask your mother, sister, wife, daughter, whosoever who have in family and you will know the truth. Because being the cynosure of your own mother’s hypocritical vision while growing up, you may have failed to notice that females are not seen around in any place after sunset in order protect herself from predatory behavior of ubiquitously present nocturnal creatures with deep animal instincts. And this has got confirmed by the shameless distinction of India getting rated as the 4^th most dangerous place for women in the world!

Ok, I agree that behavior will vary in degrees depending on a male’s background, but essentially almost all of them remain mentally glued to females around in their environment. The fact that an average Indian male cannot think beyond females is evident from their sex-laced talks; politics and sports come much later if time permits to think “beyond”! It is a different matter that in their entire quest for becoming “attracted to opposite sex”, they have not at all worked on improving their own “attractiveness quotient”. Almost the entire population of Indian males remains as undesirable as ever. I always wonder: how can the “male ego” permit such bizarre behavior that you spend your entire life ogling at female brigade and never ever get to enjoy even a chance glance from the so desired opposite sex? No hurt ego, guys?

This uniquely Indian male behavior stems from the societal belief in male’s superiority in the existential ladder. India wouldn’t be suffering the grossly skewed male:female ratio otherwise. An average Indian doesn’t feel any pain or a sense of sin by indulging into brutal female foeticide. And, even in this 21^st century, India is yet to legislate a criminal penal code for this all-prevalent heinous act.

This belief in male supremacy gets manifested in Indian males’ behavior. It is so deeply entrenched that irrespective of their own living status, they exercise “equality” in their “right to entertainment” through their “object of desire” i.e. females always. He could be a beggar but he will not deny himself his “birth-right” to seriously fantasize about a Bollywood female star!

Nothing can be more ugly than a lecherous Indian male’s face, and more dirty than his mind! And you get to witness these things even while abroad. Their excitement on seeing you, a fellow Indian female, is so palpable that it borders on obnoxiousness. Even in a foreign land you do not feel safe sighting an Indian male. Because for him an Indian female becomes an outlet for connecting to “familiar” and an outpouring for his frustrations of being treated like a “non-entity” by the “superior” whites – foreigners. Their indecent proposals are all visible in their otherwise blank expressions!

Ask any female tourist post her India visit and she will narrate horrifying tales of her harassments, with a “promise” never to return to our great land ever! (Indian Government’s “Atithi Devo Bhavo” ads reflect the same nauseating Indian males’ mindset; I doubt if Aamir Khan has been able to drive home his point in even a single unashamed Indian male’s mind.)

I repeat: all you average Indian males, if you so desire the opposite sex’s attention, first work upon yourself to become “desirable”; otherwise your despicably offensive behavior will keep you in the “unwanted” section forever – and you “appreciating beauty” – yes, Indian females are considered beautiful by all unlike their male counterparts! - with starved sensibilities evident all over your face and in your being!

I wish my fellow Indian males could understand that the cycle of life completes when both man and woman complement each other equally…