Don’t laugh! This is no Sholay hangover. How else do I call a person who decides to suffer from “dementia”? But I believe him when he proclaims his illness. Now does this mean that from now on he will start behaving in a certain manner befitting his state of mind – brain, I mean?
Will Suresh Kalmadi – I remember his name! – forget that he is a human being? And start behaving like an animal? Will he start using all his four limbs for locomotion? Will he start eating – carnivorous or omnivorous or a vegetarian? – and drinking – will depend on the species he chooses for himself – and sleeping like a lesser evolved creature of the animal kingdom? Also, will he wear only his integument from now on? Clothes may not find any use on him hereafter.
Should Suresh Kalmadi be kept out of his home in his present state of being? Tell me, how can humans cohabit with a non-human? How will he remember his relationships? What if he starts behaving with animal instincts? Can anybody be safe with him around? And, will not putting him within the walls of a home amount to cruelty to animal? Who is going to be ready to bear the brunt ofManeka Gandhi’s ire?
What will he do if he manages to set himself free from Tihar? Which work will be deemed suitable for him? Forget about IOA’s office, even the Parliamentdoesn’t allow any animal inside. Then, can you trust him with a cart, howsoever bullish his attitude may seem to be? Zoo? Not a bad idea! India’s future children may have the fortune to examine an extinct species from such close quarters. He will also be harmful being behind the barbs.
I have another fear. What if he forgets that he had promised to sue Times Nowfor exposing his misdeeds in organizing Common Wealth Games? And decides to hug Arnab Goswami? (Sorry, Arnab; but according to me there is a strong possibility of this happening looking into his current state of existence. So, take care.)
Now, tell me, Mr. Kalmadi, did you too have these thoughts and thus you decided to forget all about your self-inflicted selective-at-will dementia? Try some other trick next time to stay out of Tihar jail.
Wait a minute; I hear him singing loud:
“What’s my name? What’s my name? … My name is Kalmadi, Kalmadi ki jubani …”
May God Bless his soul for entertaining India’s starved sensibilities … :)
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